My husband and I had a conversation that touched me deeply. I will never forget it. We have some wonderfulness coming in our lives and he told me he just wants me to be happy. I told him that is what I want too, for him to be happy. He told me he is deeply happy. That he is happy makes me deeply happy. I thought about the reality of marriage and what a miracle it is for two people to be married, like each other, love each other and be happy together. My parents were never ever happy. There marriage was horrible beyond description and a lie. Since that conversation I have let memories flood back into my mind of some of those horrible horrible times. I realized today how much the sorrow, pain and grief of my parents marriage effects how I think today. My husband telling me he is happy caused a deep quiet settled feeling inside me that I have never felt in my life. I have always been waiting for the perfect time for life to be so that he would be happy. He just wants me to be happy. I am happy. I am thankful for more than I could ever write on a million blogs. His happiness and contentment only magnifies my happy contentment.
I have deeply realized the reality, that God orchestrates our lives and the timing from big things to small things. My daughter has surgery this Friday. I am taking vacation time next week to be with her while her husband works. Then that weekend my husband has a three day weekend so we are going to see our oldest son in his new home and town. That following Monday is a holiday, which I will still be on vacation and my husband has it as a paid holiday so Monday we are leaving our oldest sons and going to Billings. We are going to spend the day there and have fun together. We want to see the new Scheels store and I have never been to Hobby Lobby. My girlfriend is driving to Billings that day to meet me at Hobby Lobby as we have been talking about going. So God willing after being with my daughter while she recovers from surgery, we will go to Zach’s and then spend that Monday in Billings.
We hope to move out of this valley by this summer, God willing. I love going to church on Sunday and seeing the people I have come to know from living here. I realized I am not homesick for any place on earth. I am home here. If we move I do not know that I would be homesick for here or not. I think I will only miss the people I have come to know and love here. Especially Tana and all the people related through marriage from our kids getting married. But nothing to worry about. I am so deeply thankful my husband is genuinely happy and the happiness that gives me makes life beautiful in spite of the sick evil horror going on in this world. XOXOXO